Erikson believes that a person is unable to be truly intimate with others until he or she has made progress with addressing their own identity. Marcias, the researcher for identity status, developed a similar idea with addressing their own identity. Macias also developed an idea designed to determine the quality of intimacy in a persons life. A person answered several questions about dating, friendship, and interpersonal he or she commitments may be classified into four categories; Intimate-works at developing mutual personal relationships, has several close friends, involved in a committed love relationship, and is able to express both affectionate and angry feelings in the relationship.
Pre-intimate- is a person who has dated but is involved in a committed love relationship, is aware of the possibilities of relating intimately with others, and feels conflicted about commitment and love relationships. Stereotyped- constricted and immature person who has not gone beyond superficial dating relationships, has several friends but they lack significant depth, and he/she dates regularly but does not get involved. Isolated- lacks endurance personal relationships, rarely dates and the person tend to be anxious and immature lacking assertiveness and social skills.
If I were to do a test on myself I would say that I am a very mature person who knows what she wants in life because when I am with a person I am very committed and try my hardest to make things work. I would never cheat or do anything to hurt the person that I am with. I dont have any problems expressing my feelings to my partner.
I have a friend who refuses to be in a relationship. I feel that she still has a lot of growing up to do and she enjoys playing with other peoples feelings. These people dont know what love is yet and might not ever open that page for someone else. As for me I know what love is and what it takes to have a good solid relationship.
McAdams, (2006) The person: A new introduction to personality psychology (4th ed.) Hoboken NJ: John Wiley & Sons.